Marriage Advice

Angela   KY,USA

Posted at 3:19pm on Tuesday, March 16th, 2010

Ive been with my husband for 9 years been married for five the first 4 years we was havin sex 5 times or more a day we couldnt keep our hands off each other, then we had our first child and everything pretty much went down hill from there, 4 years ago i had a male friend he thinks i cheated but i didnt, so when i was pregnet with my 3 year old he cheated with my best friend ( he says he didnt have sex with her i dont no) now these days i dont even want to look at him, we barley have sex i dont wanna touch him anymore i love him we have 3 kids together, Would anyone have any advice they could give me? mind you we got together when I was 18 im only 26 now Please help

BONITA   Location unknown

Posted at 10:34pm on Friday, March 5th, 2010

THANK YOU BONIT'S FRIEND FOR YOUR WORDS. WELL HE HASN'T HAD AN AFFAIR YET, BUT HE FINALLY CONFESSED HE HAS FEELINGS FOR HIS CO-WORKER. WE ARE TRYING TO WORK THINGS OUT BECAUSE I FEEL THERE IS STILL HOPE FOR US. I DONT DARE ASK HIM TO QUIT BECAUSE I UNLIKE HIMSELF AM NOT SELFISH. I KNOW HOW MUCH HE LOVES HIS JOB EVEN BEFORE THIS 40 YEAR OLD LADY CAME ALONG.I FEEL LIKE SUCH A FAILURE BECAUSE I'M ONLY 29 AND CAN NOT COMPREHEND WHAT ATTRACTS HIM TO THIS OLDER LADY. WE HAVE BEEN TALKING EVERY NIGHT BEFORE WE GO TO BED. HE GIVES ME SO MUCH HOPE THAT HE CAN FIX THINGS BETWEEN US, AND AS SOON AS HE COMES BACK FROM WORK IT'S LIKE WE ARE BACK AT SQUARE ONE. WE HAVE TWO BOYS AND LATELY I HAVE BEEN NOTICING THAT HE IS COLD TOWARDS THEM. HE REALLY DOESN'T COMPREHEND WHAT HE IS DOING TO ME. THIS MAN IS MY WHOLE WORLD. I AM DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH HIM AND FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM MORE AND MORE EACH DAY. I JUST WISH I KNEW WHAT TO DO SO THAT HE CAN GET OVER HER. I HONESTLY THINK HE IS CONFUSING FEELING SORRY FOR HER AND FEELING ATTRACTED TO HER. SHE HAS TOLD HIM ALL THESE STORIES ABOUT HER BEING CHEATED ON SO MANY TIMES AND HOW HER MEN HAVE TREATED HER, AND I THINK MY HUSBAND FEELS PITTY FOR HER. I REALLY HOPE HE REALIZES FAST THAT HE HAS A LOVING WIFE THAT ADORES HIM AND IS EVERYTHING FOR HER. I HAVE TOLD HIM SEVERAL TIMES THAT IF I WERE SOMEONE ELSE I WOULD HAVE ALREADY SENT HIM ON HIS WAY, BECAUSE I DONT THINK THERE IS ANOTHER GIRL OUT THERE THAT WOULD PUT UP WITH HER HUSBAND TELLING HER, I HAVE FEELINGS FOR MY CO-WORKER.

Bonita's friend   unknown

Posted at 8:20pm on Friday, March 5th, 2010

Dear Bonita,
I hate to say this but it sounds like your husband is having an affair. I could be wrong and hope I am but I have seen so many friends go through this. Try being calm, ignore him for a week or so. Get busy with your life while keeping tabs on him. Let's hope that he is not having an affair but just needs some space. Try giving him the space and you take a break from him too. Hope all works out well for you.

KW   Canada

Posted at 6:43pm on Friday, March 5th, 2010

Dear Stop Complaining,
I can't stand people who are as self-righteous as you seem to be. Guess what? Sometimes life throws you curve balls and you have to adjust your life accordingly. I hope life goes off track for you someday so you stop having such a black and white view on life.

nathy   santabarbara

Posted at 1:08pm on Friday, March 5th, 2010

I being married for 3 years with a great man also a great dad but the only problem I'm having is sex there's no sex at all I try to communicate with him how I feel that we need to be connecting more sexually but he won't listen I understand we have a busy schedule but once in a while having wild sex won't hurt lol!!!! And most of the time is me who starts. I'm getint really worried now Help!!!!

BONITA   Location unknown

Posted at 9:38am on Monday, March 1st, 2010

I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR THE PAST 13 YEARS. I HAVE ALWAYS MEANT THE WORLS TO MY HUSBAND. UNTIL ABOUT A MONTH AND A HALF AGO. HE STARTED CHANGING I FELT HIM DIFFRENT. HE WAS NO LONGER CARYING IF I WOULD CRY OR IF I STOPPED TALKING TO HIM IT WASN'T LIKE BEFORE WHERE HE WOULD COME TO ME AND ASK ME WHAT WAS WRONG, IT WAS LIKE HE WAS RELIEFED THAT I WAS NOT TALKING TO HIM. SO MANY THINGS THAT CHANGED, AND FOR THE FIRST TIME I COULD NOT READ HIS MIND, I COULD NOT TELL WHAT HE WAS THINKING. I KEPT INSISTING FOR HIM TO TELL ME WHAT WAS WRONG. THIS PAST FRIDAY WAS HIS BIRTHDAY AND IT WAS THE WORST EVENING EVER. HE IGNORED ME THE WHOLE TIME AND WAS JUST LOOKING TOWARDS THE FLOOR. I FINALLY GOT HIME TO TALK TO ME LAST NIGHT AND HE SHATTERED MY HEART IN PIECES. HE STARTED BY SAYING HE LOVES ME THAT HE LOVES ME VERY MUCH BUT... HE IS NO LONGER IN LOVE WITH ME. I KEPT ASKING HOW HE KNOWS THIS AND HE SAID HE JUST KNOWS. I ASKED IF I DID SOMETHING AND HE SAID NO THAT I WAS PERFECT. IF I AM PERFECT WHY IS HE NO LONGER IN LOVE WITH ME? I HAVE BEEN CRYING FOR THE PAST 12HOURS STRAIGHT WITH NO SLEEP AND STILL CANNOT COMPRHEND THIS. CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT THIS MEANS? WHAT DOES IT MEAN WHEN YOUR HUSBAND LOVES YOU BUT IS NO LONGER IN LOVE WITH YOU? PLEASE HELP!!

Chris   USA

Posted at 6:35am on Wednesday, February 17th, 2010

I am married to a wonderful woman for just over five years now. When we were dating, sex was a regular part of our interaction. We have added two kids, a big move, two full time jobs with crazy schedules and bought a house in the time since then. Now sex is something that she "doesn't need." Yes, I do understand how things work, that women are different than men, and that we aren't teenagers anymore. Don't group me with the rest of the neandrethals out there that just want a booty call. I am looking for intimate, meaningful, passionate sex. I believe it should happen more than once a month. It is something that we talk and talk and talk about. This usually ends with me giving up before it turns into a fight. Any ideas?

Stop Complaining.. you picked him   Happy without kids land

Posted at 11:46am on Thursday, February 11th, 2010

Dear HB abroad: I am sorry to hear that you already have 3 kids at the age of 30 and that you feel that you can't compete with sexy teenagers. Guess what.. you chose your path. I am 33 and I am sexier than any awkward teenage kid because I took care of myself and put myself first. I chose not to have children because I like the life that I have with my husband the way it is. He's a musician and about to go on tour, so kids really don't fit in the mix. I mapped out the life I wanted and planned accordingly. Why are you complaining about the life that you chose? You picked the guy, you had kids with him.. and now you are blaming him for being himself? Sorry, you chose him and you have a choice to leave him if you really feel that bad about him. I think women need to make better choices in whom they choose to bear children with. It's really sad to see so many women stuck in relationships with perverts, cheaters, etc. Get to know someone for several years.. yea, I said YEARS, before you decide marry and have kids with them.

siya   india

Posted at 3:17am on Wednesday, February 10th, 2010

hii everyone..!!
well i am having relationship with a guy for past almost 3 years. he lives in canada and i am living in india. its very difficult to maintain long distance relationship. biggest constraint is time. its totally opposite. he hardly get time to talk as when he is free i am in office and when i am freee he is in office. although we talk daily. he calls me up daily. he is posessive about me. well after 3 years of relationship he needs time to get married as he wants to get proffessional sound first. he need 2 years more. i am 23 yrs old right now. i am feeling as if he wants to marry me or not..!! this is the biggest question in my mind to wait for him or move on...!!! please suggest me

victoria   nigeria

Posted at 3:16pm on Sunday, February 7th, 2010

u guys have a great list there, am getting married next month and i know this is a great lead for me in my marriage, because its said that when both of you live together and recognize your differences and work things out amicably that is called love,and with all these advice you can live together forever. i also think understanding each other matters alot in marriages and relationhsips as well as maturity, no mattter your age so far you can handle your opposite sex maturely and in a romantic way.