A Woman's Guide to Flirting
By: Amy Cunningham
So you want to flirt... or you want to learn how a man flirts. This guide for women cues you in on the basics of flirting with men and helps you learn how to know if he's flirting with you.
How to Tell if He's Flirting With You
When men flirt, they generally give off cues that exude their masculinity. If your notice that a guy is exhibiting any of these behaviors or gestures, then it's likely that he's flirting with you! Get your flirtatious grove on and flirt back.
- Arches his back.
- Sways his pelvis.
- Laughs loudly.
- Tugs his tie.
- Clasps back of his neck.
- Squares his shoulders.
- Puffs his chest.
- Stiffens his stance.
- Teases you in a friendly manner.
- Winks as you from a distance.
- Smiles suggestively.
- Engages in direct eye contact.
- Casually touches you.
Now that you know what to look for when flirting, here are few things that you want to avoid. If you notice a man exhibiting any of these behaviors, escape now.
- He walks over with over-confidence.
- He approaches in a controlling manner and dominates the conversation.
- He invades your personal space right away.
If all has gone well and you've read his cues properly, he'll either approach you, or you can approach him. Tread carefully either way. If he's approaching, you don't want to do anything to undermine his confidence. Remember, it takes a lot for a man to just walk up to a woman and talk to her. If you're approaching him, remember that you're sending out signals during the approach that could make or break you before you even have a chance to talk!
- Lock eyes for a few seconds, then drop your gaze. Eye contact is a sign of openness. Most men will pick up on this flirtatious and approach you.
- If the guy is approaching you, be classy and charming. He's probably nervous and a bit worried about rejection. Take these into consideration and play nice.
- While he's approaching, smile suggestively. Experts agree that smiling is one of the most important things you can do to make yourself more attractive and approachable.
Once he's arrived (or you have), it's time to get the conversation started.
- Speak slowly and with direct statements rather than abstract ones. Remember that men are less 'emotional' than women.
- Laugh at his jokes, but don't overdo it.
- Keep your eyes on him, but glance away. Men tend to not engage in direct eye contact as much as women.
- Ask him about his job as Men tend to define themselves by their careers.
- Find common ground. The most important aspect of your conversation is to find out what you have in common, be it hobbies, friends, jobs, or whatnot.
- Don't talk about yourself too much. Answer his questions, but be sure to ask questions about him as well.
The way a man dresses gives you clues to his personality. Pay attention to the following:
- Are his top few buttons unbuttoned?
- Is he dressed casually? Or more formally?
- Is his appearance neat and clean?
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