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A Woman's Guide to Flirting



So you want to flirt... or you want to learn how a man flirts. This guide for women cues you in on the basics of flirting with men and helps you learn how to know if he's flirting with you.

How to Tell if He's Flirting With You


When men flirt, they generally give off cues that exude their masculinity. If your notice that a guy is exhibiting any of these behaviors or gestures, then it's likely that he's flirting with you! Get your flirtatious grove on and flirt back.

These include:
  • Arches his back.
  • Sways his pelvis.
  • Laughs loudly.
  • Tugs his tie.
  • Clasps back of his neck.
  • Squares his shoulders.
  • Puffs his chest.
  • Stiffens his stance.
  • Teases you in a friendly manner.
  • Winks as you from a distance.
  • Smiles suggestively.
  • Engages in direct eye contact.
  • Casually touches you.

What to Watch Out For
Now that you know what to look for when flirting, here are few things that you want to avoid. If you notice a man exhibiting any of these behaviors, escape now.
  • He walks over with over-confidence.
  • He approaches in a controlling manner and dominates the conversation.
  • He invades your personal space right away.

How to Approach Him
If all has gone well and you've read his cues properly, he'll either approach you, or you can approach him. Tread carefully either way. If he's approaching, you don't want to do anything to undermine his confidence. Remember, it takes a lot for a man to just walk up to a woman and talk to her. If you're approaching him, remember that you're sending out signals during the approach that could make or break you before you even have a chance to talk!
  • Lock eyes for a few seconds, then drop your gaze. Eye contact is a sign of openness. Most men will pick up on this flirtatious and approach you.
  • If the guy is approaching you, be classy and charming. He's probably nervous and a bit worried about rejection. Take these into consideration and play nice.
  • While he's approaching, smile suggestively. Experts agree that smiling is one of the most important things you can do to make yourself more attractive and approachable.

Once You're There.
Once he's arrived (or you have), it's time to get the conversation started.
  • Speak slowly and with direct statements rather than abstract ones. Remember that men are less 'feely' than women.
  • Laugh at his jokes, but don't overdo it.
  • Keep your eyes on him, but glance away. Men tend to not engage in direct eye contact as much as women.
  • Ask him about his job as Men tend to define themselves by their careers.
  • Find common ground. The most important aspect of your conversation is to find out what you have in common, be it hobbies, friends, jobs, or whatnot.
  • Don't talk about yourself too much. Answer his questions, but be sure to ask questions about him as well.
Other Things To Look For.
The way a man dresses gives you clues to his personality. Pay attention to the following:
  • Are his top few buttons unbuttoned?
  • Is he dressed casually? Or more formally?
  • Is his appearance neat and clean?


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Comments to date: 26. This is page 1 of 3.

buffy   south africa

Posted at 6:38pm on Wednesday, July 9th, 2008

i only seem to attract married guys or guys with girls ? help

Suga   Australia

Posted at 6:23am on Thursday, June 26th, 2008

and alo remeber try to look a little more flirtasious,lol dress up in revealing clothes but dont overdo it other wise the guy would think your easy n we dont want that

Suga   Australia

Posted at 6:19am on Thursday, June 26th, 2008

This comment is to "in love" we all think that one guy from highschool is the one! you should try to spend time with just you and him and try to flirt with his best mates, the guy you like would want you more! and always remeber he wants you not the other way round!!!

In Love   New York

Posted at 1:05am on Tuesday, June 17th, 2008

Heyy! Well... This sounds really helpful. I'm going to try it because there is this guy who I really like. Ok... So here's my story: I'm still in high school. He is one year younger than me... but we get a long great. I don't know if he likes me though. I don't want to jump to a conclusion yet... because he may just be being nice. We talk online, and in person. We alway's say hi to eachother, and bye when we have to go to class. we have a few perverted jokes. :P but it is all in good fun. I really like him... and I would like to go out with him. Any feedback? I'm just not sure on what to do as the next move. Anything helps!! thanks a bunch!

desperate for lovin   cowitche

Posted at 4:52am on Wednesday, May 28th, 2008

omg! you're on fire. this advice helped so much. so, i've had this major crush on a guy for-ev-er (seriously, ya know!). he's all i ever think about even as i go all my daily activities. who knew a guy would take up so much of my energy? and now, because of your exquist advice, i've finally caught his eye. thanks a bunch. i'll never forget you :) :) :) :)

Anonymous   Location unknown

Posted at 4:39am on Sunday, May 25th, 2008

The guy i likes flirts with a lot of girls...how do i know if hes into me?

person   somewhere

Posted at 2:28am on Tuesday, April 8th, 2008

Tip: guys are pervs. well, most of them are.

Anggie   Location unknown

Posted at 3:20am on Friday, April 4th, 2008

I love my neighbor but, i have avoided him for like 2 years. I just started hanging with him again. We totally flirt but he is shy and I'm to nervous to say anything about our relationship. I really need help.

chelsea   sigonella, sicily, Italy

Posted at 3:09pm on Monday, March 10th, 2008

There's a guy that i've already dated but i really want him again and i keep remembering things we used to do together and what we used to do and how i used to feel

2confused   Australia

Posted at 1:29am on Tuesday, February 5th, 2008

A good guy mate ours has a different posture with us, with every1 else he stands up straight and casual..hes really tall and when hes with us he bends his knees and bobs? whats up with that? its almost like hes trying to be cool,

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