So you want to flirt... or you want to learn how a woman flirts. This guide for men cues you in on the basics of flirting with women and helps you learn how to know if she's flirting with you.
How to Tell if She's Flirting With You
Women give off several nonverbal, flirtatious cues to signify that they are interested and attracted to you. You simply need to know what they are and be observant enough to pick up on them! Most of these flirtatious cues exude sexual suggestiveness, so men may naturally pick up on them. However, the trained eye can pick up so much more. For instance, did you know that the most common flirtatious behavior a woman engages in is the hair flip. When a woman runs her fingers through her hair of flips her hair, she's generally trying to get your attention.
Here are more behaviors women engage in while flirting:
Sways her hips while walking.
Tilts her head and/or exposes her neck.
Licks or bites her lips.
Tosses, plays, or twirls her hair.
Crosses and uncrosses her legs. Or her crossed leg is pointed towards you. Or, she's rocking her crossed leg back and forth.
Slips her foot in and out of her shoe.
Adjusts the tone of her voice to match yours.
Adjusts her talking speed to match yours.
Holds a lingering gaze a few seconds longer than usual.
Giggles or laughs when you laugh.
Engages in friendly teasing.
Winks at you.
Raises her eyebrows, lowers them, then smiles.
Flutters her eyelashes.
Casually touches to your arm, shoulder, thigh, or hand.
Plays with her hair or twists in around her fingers while looking at you.
Raises or lowers her voice volume to match yours.
Touches her cheek or rubs her chin.
Exposes her palms.
Rubs her wrists up and down.
Has tall, straight posture while sitting or walking
Puts her fingernail between her teeth.
Plays with her jewelry.
Raises her eyebrows.
Wears sexy clothes or shows suggestive cleavage.
What to Watch Out For
Now that you know what to look for when flirting, here are few things that you want to avoid. If you notice a woman exhibiting any of these behaviors, it generally means that she's not interested and that it's time to move on.
She's hunched over.
She taps her fingers on the table or on her glass.
She taps her foot or keeps her legs uncrossed.
She won't look you directly in the eye.
How to Approach Her
If all has gone well and you've read her cues properly, it's time to approach her. Tread carefully here though because you're sending out signals while approaching her that could make or break you before you even have a chance to talk to her!
Have self-confidence and exude this when walking towards her. Keep your head held high and your chest out.
Smile. Smile. Smile.
Keep it easy going and carefree.
Don't immediately invade her personal space as it's an aggressive behavior and will generally scare her off.
Have a good opening line prepared and practiced. You can choose based on the situation, but make sure that it's unique, clever, and most definitely not cheesy or overly suggestive. Humor tends to work well.
Tell her your name and that you'd like to spend some time with her talking.
Once You're There.
Once you're there, it's time to get the conversation started.
Speak openly and honestly.
Nod or give verbal cues such as 'uh huh' or 'yeah' to show that you're listening and validating her comments.
A little humor is always a good thing. Did you know that the majority of women say that they're looking for someone who can make them laugh?
Don't talk about yourself too much. Answer her questions, but be sure to ask questions about her as well.
Find common ground. The most important aspect of your conversation is to find out what you have in common, be it hobbies, friends, jobs, or whatnot.
Remember that while most men define themselves by their job or career, women are generally more interested in you spend your off time. Make sure that you let her know.
Other Things To Look For.
The way a woman dresses gives you clues to his personality. Pay attention to her clothing, right down to her shoes, and you'll learn more about her.
Is she dressed seductively with cleavage showing?
Is she wearing open-toed sandals? The more open her shoes are, the more willing she is to be open with you.